Oops, I Wish I Hadn't Said That, I Wish I Had Done This….

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Back in elementary school, when playing sports, we often were allowed a ‘do-over’. As we got older, coaches and teachers stopped allowing this. The ball had to be played where it was. I suspect the reason for this was to “prepare us for life”. And, so we learned, no ‘do-overs’, if I screwed up or forgot to do something, too late, can’t fix it.

  • While, there must be rules in games (no way to score if there are not), does everything in life have to play by these same rules?
  • What if when we said something we wished we hadn’t, we simply went back to the person and said, “I am sorry, I wish I hadn’t said that, what I wanted to say is this…”
  • What if we wanted to do this, we went back and simply did it?

In short, what if we started with the premise that nothing in life is irreparable or irretrievable, except death. While certainly words matter, see my blog of this same name (Words Matter), actions speak loudly and ‘do-overs’ are a great way to take action and demonstrate intent. Another way to think about it… it’s not what you do, it’s what you do next.

Elisa K. Spain

 

 

Who Gets To Decide?

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Just about every leadership book and every leadership speaker talks about the importance of allowing people to fail. The concept is: true delegation does not occur unless and until I allow people to make their own decisions, take their own risks and succeed or fail on their own.

Easy to say, hard to do, on so many levels. Some of the common questions are:

  • How much risk should I allow them to take?
  • What if I am certain they are making the wrong decision; a decision that is going to cost me money, put the company at risk, put the person at risk, etc. How can I simply look away and allow the failure to occur?
  • How many failures are okay?

Lately, I have come to realize this question, who gets to decide, applies in our business life and in our personal lives. It applies to our children and to our aging parents. Just recently this realization was brought home to me with the following stories.

The teenage son of a friend is more focused on sports than on his homework, a familiar story. Mom says, “we have to make him do his homework”. Thus ensures a fight between mom and son. Dad says, “let him suffer the consequences if he chooses not to do his homework”. Who gets to decide? Who is “right”?

The 89 year old father of a friend has cancer. His actions indicate he is confused about what he wants. He says he is willing to get treatment, but he misses his appointments. He lives alone and refuses a live-in caregiver, or even a visiting caregiver. Prior to the diagnosis, he was cognitively in fine shape. Son says, “we have to make him go for his treatments”.  Daughter says, “if he wants to be alone, doesn’t attend his appointments, doesn’t return the doctor’s phone calls, it’s his decision to make, not ours”.

Back to the three questions above…

  • How much risk should I allow them to take?
  • What if I am certain they are making the wrong decision, a decision that is going to cost me money. How can I simply look away and allow the failure to occur?
  • How many failures are okay?

Which choice is the more courageous one? Who gets to decide?

Elisa K. Spain

Are You Favoring The Heroic Over The Prudent?

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

We worship winners – especially those who demonstrate leadership, confront a crisis and prevail. There’s nothing wrong with that, as long as the hero did not create the crisis in the first place.

But what about those who keep crises from erupting at all?

Who are the UNSUNG heroes working for you (and helping you avoid the ditch)?

Who are the wise that simply do the right thing, rather than the bold thing?

Are you only recognizing the “heroes” in your company, and ignoring those who help you avoid the storms altogether?

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

Entrepreneurial Success Is Not About Taking Risk

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

There is a long held belief that successful entrepreneurs are high risk takers. In fact, the common lore says, “not only do they take more risks, they are successful because of it.”

Over the last 15 years I have worked with over a hundred entrepreneurs, first as a business advisor and then as a Vistage Chair. My experience tells me otherwise.

Here’s what I observe:

  • Successful entrepreneurs follow the same practices the Great by Choice CEOs follow in Jim Collins’ book.
  • They have a clear vision of where they are headed.
  • They hire top talent and their employees understand their vision.
  • They invest in opportunities that support their vision.
  • They only invest in opportunities they understand, and where they have experience or vision, that gives them reason to expect the return they are seeking.

Finally, successful entrepreneurs have an instinctive sense of timing. It is this instinct, coupled with the discipline outlined above, that sets successful entrepreneurs apart.

Perhaps to the outsider who doesn’t see what the entrepreneur sees, it is this instinct that appears as taking high risk.

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

Attitude Is What Matters (Even With The Economy)

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

When I watched this Brian Westbury video, The Triple Mandate, I was struck by the fact that several years into the current recovery, many business owners and investors are still worried. Understandable. The Great Recession took its toll on both our economy and our psyche.  The memory, while distant, is still fresh.

Yet, what struck me listening to Brian’s view about gradually rising rates, and an undervalued stock market; in short, his optimistic view, was how many business owners and investors, relying on emotion, may be missing opportunities.

Some questions to consider:

  • When has your attitude, either optimistic or pessimistic, caused you to miss an opportunity? Or conversely, saved you from a loss?
  • When making investment decisions, when do you follow the data vs. rely on your instinct?
  • Is the answer to question 1 different when it comes to making investments in your business (either human capital or equipment) vs. investments in securities?

 

Elisa K. Spain

Words Matter Part II

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

A few weeks ago, my post “Words Matter“, generated several responses. One reader reminded me, like with everything, there is another side. The side of being too politically correct. The place where we so carefully script our words that we lose any sense of real communication.

What to do? On the one hand, increasingly we hear words of hate and intolerance, on the other, more and more we hear words that are so crafted they don’t mean anything. How do we reconcile these two opposing trends in our society?

I wonder if the common theme between the two is a lack of authenticity? And…

  • If fear is what is truly present, rather than intolerance, how do we express this authentically?
  • Is it possible to be authentic and at the same time express tolerance of differences?
  • Is it possible to be authentic and be kind in the words and tone we choose?
  • Is it possible to express our fears and concerns while being open to hearing someone else’s truth?

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

 

Words Matter

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

We live in an increasingly diverse world, and at the same time it seems we have become increasingly intolerant. The more you look for signs of both, the more you will find it. Some say we need to simply stop looking so hard; I say we need to start looking harder.

Diversity is part of my core; I work hard to create diversity in my Vistage groups and in my personal life. I find people who are different from me interesting. I learn more from people who see the world differently from me than I do from those who see it the same. And, I find, for much the same reasons, diversity in a peer group creates a higher functioning group. When everyone is thinking and saying something different, the member has a richer experience, a richer opportunity to come to his or her own decisions.

So what does this have to do with words? We have a choice. We can work hard to live our lives surrounded by people who are exactly like us, listen to news that supports our way of thinking, and insulate ourselves from anyone and anything that isn’t aligned with our way of thinking and how we see the world.

Or, we can live in the world as it is, a mosaic of differences.

If we choose the former, we need only choose words that are in common usage in the community we align with. If on the other hand, we choose the latter, then words matter. Whether it’s that awful racist video from the SAE fraternity bus; or hurtful statements about Muslims based on the actions of Middle East countries; or simply making comments that are disrespectful; what is heard by the listener is what matters.

Sometimes the words can seem innocuous, and harmless. Expressions like “open the kimono” to some is simply a colorful way to describe being transparent. Others call it sexist and racist. Forbes included “open the kimono” in its “Most Annoying Business Jargon” bracket, wherein Bruce Barry, a professor at Vanderbilt University’s Owen School of Business, calls it “kind of creepy.”

Words matter in a diverse world, because if we want to be heard, we must speak in a manner that allows us to be heard. Words that are heard as inflammatory, cause the listener to stop listening and hear only the disrespect.

In short, if you want to be heard, choose words that allow the full mosaic of listeners to hear you.

Elisa K. Spain

 

What Happens When Market Forces Intervene?

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Last week I wrote about healthy body, healthy mind = healthy business. One of my readers reminded me, there is a corollary. While, the CEO’s health can and does impact the business, what happens when the business faces market forces and impacts the health of the CEO?

On the one hand, what happens when the market cycle is a down cycle?

While we all would like to believe we can separate ourselves from what is happening to us, we know that, at least for most of us, that isn’t so. Losses in our life affect our well-being. And, business losses, which are part of our lives, can impact our sense of well-being and therefore our health.

On the flip side, what about when things are consistently good for an extended period of time? Do we become complacent, or what I call the “fat cat” syndrome? Life is good, so why not enjoy, enjoy, enjoy. And, when does enjoyment become a negative health factor?

Here’s the story of the reader who contacted me…

  •  Each time his business hits a tough cycle, competitors have gone out, his company dipped and then survived and then thrived each time – with new achievements. And, at the same time, while his well-being was impacted, feeling depressed, losing weight, he continued to focus on health and fitness. My sense is, his business recovery has consistently outperformed because he continued to take care of his mental and physical hygiene, even when things looked their bleakest.
  • And then when things are on an upswing, he began to relax; life feels good, he feels good. He continues to work out, and finds himself eating, traveling, enjoying more and gaining weight. Again, he is mindful of this result and once again begins to focus on health and hygiene.

I am grateful to this reader for reminding me that maintaining our mental and physical health is a balancing act that ebbs and flows, and to be mindful of the impact of both ups and downs.

The Power Of Shared History

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

A couple of weeks ago I attended the Vistage Chair Conference and spent an evening with 9 senior women chairs. All of us were at the gathering at the invitation of one of the people present, i.e. we all knew at least one person and none of us knew everyone. We talked about a lot of things and then serendipitously began to share stories about challenges early in our careers. In the spirit of full disclosure, the stories mostly were about challenges of being young women faced with inappropriate situations in male-dominated companies.

A few days later I had a conversation with a male chair who is a longtime friend and mentor. I was telling him what a wonderful time I had with the other women earlier that week.

I told him about our shared history conversation and the direction it took. After telling him a few of my stories, he then shared his own stories from the other side. Such as when he was in a leadership position and falsely accused, offered sexual favors, etc. I was struck by the reminder that the more we share, the more common ground we find. And, that these stories are really about the personal side of business.

Like me and my women colleagues, my male colleague had several stories to tell. We talked about how these stories shape us, and that for women and people of color, because of the power equation, sometimes they shape us more.

I was struck by the value of shared histories in creating connections and overcoming stereotypes.

Wouldn’t it be cool to sit at a table with men and women, and people of all colors and backgrounds, and tell our shared histories of career and life challenges that shape the people and leaders we have become…?

Can A Focus On Culture Produce Financial Results?

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

In 2014, the theme for my Vistage groups was All That Matters is Culture. We talk about culture a lot in Vistage and we have several speakers that focus on this topic. Certainly we can all agree that focusing on culture creates a more consistent workplace. I say consistent, rather than harmonious, because as we learned from Vistage speaker, Edgar Papke, each culture is different – The important thing is to know what your culture is, hire accordingly and ensure your culture (inward facing) is consistent with your brand (outward facing).

And…when we went around the table at the end of the year, two of my CEO members shared that they had their best year yet (both had been in business 15+ years). When the other members asked the reason, both said, without hesitation, “because I focused on culture more than anything else this year. I got rid of the cancers. Everyone who is with my company today reflects the culture. I see it, the customers see it, and frankly to my surprise, the bottom line shows it”.

In one case, one of the CEOs fired his #2 producer. A risky move, so he thought. In fact, he even expected a down year as a result.  He decided the risk was worth it.

Good thing he took the risk because… he was one of the CEOs to report the best year ever.

Elisa K. Spain