Just For The Record

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

Just for the record, we introverts don’t like this any more than extroverts. 

You are probably asking yourself, where is this coming from? I had a conversation last week with an extroverted friend of mine, during which he said: “I know you introverts are secretly loving this.” 

People often have the belief that introverts aren’t social, want to be alone all the time, etc. etc. this isn’t so. While the more introverted folks amongst us, may prefer time alone to time with others, the primary difference between introverts and extroverts is where we draw our energy. Introverts go within; extroverts tend to “think out loud.” Another way to say this, introverts tend to need quiet time to recharge more often than extroverts do.

All humans are social animals. The mental health toll of this shelter in place isolation may be more significant for introverts because for many introverts in analytical jobs, working at home means working alone, no zoom, no contact. And these folks may be more reticent to arrange zoom cocktails and the like.  

What this means to me is we all need to be mindful to make time to be with people we care about, people that make us laugh, people that make us forget for a moment that we are in this situation. Today is Sunday, an excellent day to FaceTime a friend, or pick up your mobile device and use it as a phone. 

If you want to learn more about this important topic, a book I recommend to both introverts and extroverts is The Power of Introverts in A World That Can’t Stop Talking, by Susan Cain. She also has a Ted Talk by the same title.

Let’s work together. You can learn more about my leadership and transition coaching as well as my peer advisory boards here.

WE ARE NOT ALL IN THE SAME BOAT

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

A friend of mine shared this essay in his weekly letter. It resonated for me, so I am passing it on to you.

I have heard that we are all in the same boat, but it’s not like that. We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat.  Your ship could be shipwrecked and mine might not.  Or vice versa. 

For some, quarantine is optimal.  A moment of reflection, of re-connection, easy in flip flops with a cocktail or coffee.  For others, this is a desperate financial and family crisis.  Some who live alone are facing endless loneliness. While for others it is peace, rest, and time with their mother, father, sons & daughters. 

With the $600 weekly increase in unemployment, some are bringing in more money than they were working.  Others are working more hours for less money due to pay cuts or loss in sales.  Some families of four just received $3,400 from the stimulus while other families of four saw $000.  Some were concerned about getting a special candy for Easter while others were concerned that there would not be enough bread, milk, and eggs for the weekend.

Some want to go back to work because they don’t qualify for unemployment and are running out of money.  Others want to punish those who break the quarantine.  Some are home spending 2-3 hours each day helping their child with online schooling while others are spending 2-3 hours each day trying to help educate their children on top of a 10-12-hour workday. 

Some have experienced the near death because of Covid-19, some have already lost someone, and some are not sure if their loved ones are going to make it. Others don’t believe this is a big deal.  While some have faith in God and expect miracles during this 2020, others say the worst is yet to come. 

So, friends, we are not all in the same boat.  We are each on different ships during this storm, experiencing a very different journey.  We are going through a period when our perceptions and needs are very different.  Each of us will emerge from this storm in our own way.  And for all, it will be important to see beyond what we see at first glance.  Not just looking, but seeing and understanding.  

Unknown Author

YOU PIVOT™: A Man With A Plan

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

Listen to my recent appearance on the ‘On The Brink’ podcast here.

You 3.0 has become a monthly feature of this blog. While most of us continue to shelter in place, I asked myself if I should pause these stories and decided they are as relevant now as ever. And, perhaps hearing others’ stories may inspire you to create your own transition story when the virus is behind us. 

This month, I interviewed Corey, what follows is his story. 

Corey began his career as an actor. He fell into what ultimately led to founding a business while working as a temp at a management consulting firm to support his acting career. As luck would have it, Corey made friends with John, one of the Managing Partners of the firm where he worked his temp job.  

One day, John offered, “if you are ever interested in making a career move and joining us full-time, I can help.” Not too long afterward, Corey took him up on his offer, which led to a nearly ten-year career at the firm. 

“Frankly, I thought I would be a lifer,” Corey told me. “I was making great money, with great benefits, and I loved my work.”

“But then things started to change, the company was heading down a different path, and I no longer felt I fit. Yet, I stayed. The last 1 1/2 years, I was so incredibly unhappy. I think I stayed because it was so good in the beginning. I think people tend to stay longer in dysfunctional relationships because of the early days.

When I finally decided it was time to leave, I didn’t know what I was going to do next. What I did know was I was 34 years old, I had been smart with my earnings, I was single, and I could leave.

Up until this point, I hadn’t had a plan, things just happened for me, and I took advantage of opportunities that came my way. 

I spent four months interviewing and received several offers. When I asked my dad for his opinion as to which one to take, he asked me a question that simplified things for me and changed my life “which option will put you in the best position to be where you want to be when you are 40?”  

For me, I have an easier time with five years from now than the next month. I was able to fast forward in my mind and see what I wanted my career and my life to look like at 40. 

The choice was easy. I wasn’t going to work for another company; I was going to start my own business. I am proud to say that my first four hires are still with the firm, folks who reported to me, as well as peers and even people who I had previously reported to, joined as well.” 

Today the firm has fifty-six employees and $14M in annual revenue. Ever since his father’s question “what do you want it to look like when you are 40?”, Corey and his company plan in five-year increments.

The 2020 plan was focused on succession planning and taking the company to market. Corey’s successor shadowed him in 2018, and by 2019 was running the company. 

The 2025 plan called for geographic expansion. Everyone agreed we should be pragmatic about where and when to do it. Either a significant client wants us to have a presence and/or a senior trusted employee wants to be in a location. 

It turned out that Corey and his wife wanted to move to Arizona. And, they have a significant client with a presence in Arizona. The who and the where were answered.

Meanwhile, they sold the company and formalized the succession plan.

The acquiring company liked Corey’s successor for CEO, Corey joined the board and took charge of Business Development in Arizona. 

By 2025, Corey, at age 55, will likely be retired; this was part of the rationale for the transaction. His successor will be creating his own succession plan (he is four years younger) and may follow the same path as Corey.

When I asked him what retirement holds for him, “I had a clear vision at 34 for what my company would be at 40. I am not as clear this time, and I have a lot of ideas percolating. Being a project manager by trade, I will be pretty mindful and intentional as my time at the company will decrease as the next will increase. I want to do something more contributory to society. I also want to speak French fluently. I play guitar and would love to get back to gigging with it – back to performing where I started; I am passionate about food – maybe a food truck.”

I asked Corey to share what he learned from his transitions; below are his top three:

  1. Separate the decision to leave from the choice of what to do next. I used to think of a job change as a singular event. First, you find a new job, then you give notice and go to the next job. When I left my job at 34, I learned how important it is to make this separation. 
  2. Don’t wait to enjoy your life and do the things you want to do. My dad owned his own business; it never got big, $2mm in revenue, 30 employees. He was a child of two Great Depression parents. He took two weeks off every year. His mindset was you work your butt off until 65, then retire and enjoy life. Within a year of my dad turning 65, my mom starting showing symptoms of Alzheimer’s, and his dream of traveling with his wife and enjoying life turned into becoming her primary caregiver for 11 years. 
  3. Prepare for a transaction before you are ready to move on. Do it now, so the company is ready when you are. If you wait until you are emotionally done, the company’s value isn’t where it should be – you are old and exhausted. Not one of our prospective buyers requested I stay because I had a strong leadership team poised to succeed without me. I stayed because I wanted to, not because I had to.

Let’s work together. You can learn more about my leadership and transition coaching as well as my peer advisory boards here.

Gratitude For The Light

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

Dear Readers,

As most of you know, I lead a CEO Advisory Board in affiliation with Vistage International. My clients meet monthly, and before each meeting, we share an update of our lives since we last met. Typically, we give a brief overview of significant events in our business and personal lives.

With nothing typical at this time, I wrote the following letter instead of my usual update. I am sharing this with you in the spirit of finding common ground in our humanity.

“As I read over last month’s updates, I am stunned by how much has changed since then. 

First, let me say how I continue to be in awe of the leadership demonstrated by each and every one of you. From the leader who is navigating staying open and supporting the building of critical health care facilities while managing fear when an employee got sick; to another pivoting to make materials to keep grocery store employees safe. 

Those in the food business are scrambling to keep our food sources flowing; others are working to meet our infrastructure needs, and some are adapting technology to kill the virus in hospital rooms and other high-risk environments. 

Every one of you is working to keep your essential businesses operating while keeping your employees safe. And at the same time, being that steady hand when it would be so easy to succumb. 

For my husband and me, we are both fortunate to be working at home—week four for me, week three for him. We are settling into this new normal, and while I am grateful to be safe, I long for the freedoms we have all given up. Freedom to go out to dinner with friends; buy what I need at the grocery store, including paper towels and toilet paper; go to a play or take a trip. 

My niece in Miami is due to have her first baby in just a few weeks. We were to be there, and of course, will not. She is frightened to be bringing a child into this COVID-19 world and, at the same time, is finding her center as she jokes about COVID-19 baby names. 

Last night for the first time, I dreamed about traveling. I woke up happy. This dream was a sign to me that I am seeing a light at the end of this tunnel. Even though I don’t know how long the tunnel is, the light is there. 

I am grateful for the connection we have found with friends all over the world. Passover with friends from Singapore, New Mexico, and Philly as well as folks here in Chicago. Zoom happy hours and dinners with friends and family from California, New York, Miami and here in Chicago. This change, of using technology to deepen our relationships, including the distant ones, I pray will stay with us when we do get to the other side.”

To continuing our shared connection,

Elisa

Work Remotely, Are You Kidding Me?

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

This week I am pleased to share this guest blog by Andrea Simon, Corporate Anthropologist.

These times are presenting us with a new world where most of us are working remotely or, maybe, will be doing so shortly. The pandemic crisis is here, and the best solution is to separate us all. It is an important time to have to learn new skills. And even enjoy morphing into your new daily routine. For most of us, we hate this type of crisis-induced change.

Turning lemons into lemonade requires being willing to change

Change is pain. But especially now, change is absolutely necessary. Here are the challenges and opportunities:

First, your brain hates to change. It is happiest when it is doing what it has always done. When something critical happens, like this pandemic, your brain is creating a lot of cortisol, and its decision-making parts are going into overdrive. You have to learn a new routine from the time you wake up until you head to sleep. All the while, your mind is struggling with big questions like, “What is next on my calendar?” or “When can I find some quiet time for myself?” Or maybe you are grappling with how to get your Microsoft team working remotely and are frustrated that there is no IT specialist running around to help you.

Second, you can get your brain to love the new, and in the process, learn how to adapt to changing times. It will serve you well in the future. Remember how immigrants came to the U.S. with limited resources and managed to change, to adapt? Or how you went off to college and changed? People can change, and you can adjust as well.

Some things to consider

Real, lasting change just requires a bit of focus (your brain needs that) and rehearsal time. It also needs others to affirm that what you are doing is the right thing to do. No need to do it alone. To get this kind of confirmation:

  • You need to focus on the changes. The brain must focus hard on the new and get the old out of there. You can’t go to the office now, so focus on what is coming next.
  • Practice, practice, practice. You wouldn’t go on stage to perform without a lot of rehearsal time, visualization and coaching. The change you’re facing now needs some of the same. You are now an improvisational artist. Enjoy the new job you have. Make it up. It is ok not to be perfect, or even right. Just try new things and see what works for you.
  • Empathy is so important. Try to say, “I feel your pain,” and see what happens. Think about this as a “we” problem that together we can solve. The brain is happier when you talk about how “we will work to solve this” than “I need you to do this.” If you don’t know much about the power of “we,” take a look at “Conversational Intelligence“ by Judith Glaser and see how it can help your new experiences.

Thriving in new times

What to do to help yourself thrive in these new times? Here are some ideas that I hope are of help to you. I know I am not alone in sharing these, but it doesn’t hurt to hear it from a culture change expert, and you are, indeed, changing the values, beliefs and daily habits that make up your culture. Time for a new culture that you will “love” — or at least feel more comfortable living.

  • You need a headspace. I got a call from someone who started by saying, “I am sitting in my car. I needed some space from…” and you can fill in the blank. It is ok. You can say, “I am taking a walk, have to get out of the house.” But be careful. Try not to push your significant other and the kids out of “Your Kitchen.” Make it theirs as well. Difficult, but sharing is an excellent antidote for people in the same house all day long.
  • Yes, you need a workspace, but what does that mean for you, your spouse or partner, or your kids? Step back and give it some good thought. Why is space so important? As humans, we like to be comfortable in a place where we feel safe and secure. Where we feel it is ours. Why? It is how we create comfort and order for our daily living. Remember when you got your own space at work? Were you in a cubicle or the corner office? Why did it matter? What is the value people place on “space”? Space is not without meaning.

Staying connected while keeping apart

How do you unplug and friend-up when you have to stay six feet apart and there is no place to go? You can’t make dinner plans or attend conferences. Here are some clever and easy ideas people have sent me:

  • One woman does her dance class via Zoom and is having a blast.
  • Another woman teaches Pilates and yoga. She took a dozen of her clients outside and separated them to conduct the class. They enriched their bodies and minds and were careful not to invade each other’s space limits.
  • A lot of folks are conducting FaceTime, Skype, Zoom and Team meetings to bring a real face into the conversation. We are monkeys, and we bond best when we see others.
  • Families are hiking at all times of the day and all days of the week.

What’s up next? Boredom, depression?

You might be hearing that all over the place. By now, both you and your family are probably incredibly bored. But you don’t have to be. Create lists of things you can each do. Plan your day the night before so you don’t wake up and wonder where to begin. This plan is essential. Your brain likes a plan. And your day requires one.

Lastly, don’t forget about depression. The research is very compelling. Families that sit at the table and talk to each other three or more times a week tend to have less depression. It is time you put those discussions into the family meals to keep you happily connected.

This new mindset is going to stay around for some time. It is time to learn how to manage your mind.

I always like to share Winston Churchill’s perspective:

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”

Enough for now. I’ll be back with more as we all move forward during this Pandemic of 2020.

From Observation to Innovation,

AndiSimon_headshot.png

Andi Simon, Ph.D.
Corporate Anthropologist | President
Simon Associates Management Consultants
Info@simonassociates.net@simonandi

Don’t miss an episode of my On The Brink podcast! Subscribe now

It’s Tough To Be A Leader At A Time Like This

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

II received two wonderfully inspiring leadership notes last week, and I decided I couldn’t wait until Sunday to share them. Thank you, Joan and Ozzie, for reminding us of the responsibilities we have as leaders in difficult times and how hard it is.

From, Joan Davison, a member of my Vistage Peer Advisory Board:

17 Hard Things You Have To Do To Be A Great Leader

  1. You have to make the call you are afraid to make.
  2. You have to get up earlier than you want to.
  3. You have to give more than you get in return right away.
  4. You have to care more for others than they care about you.
  5. You have to feel unsure and insecure when playing it safe seems smarter.
  6. You have to lead when no one else is following you yet.
  7. You have to invest in yourself even though no one else is.
  8. You have to grind out the details when it is easier to shrug them off.
  9. You have to deliver results when making excuses is an option.
  10. You have to search for your own explanations even when you are told to accept the “facts”.
  11. You have to make mistakes and look like an idiot.
  12. You have to try and fail and try again.
  13. You have to run faster even though you are out of breath.
  14. You have to be kind to people who have been cruel to you.
  15. You have to meet deliveries that are unreasonable and deliver results that are unparalleled.
  16. You have to be accountable for your actions even when things go wrong.
  17. You have to keep moving towards where you want to be no matter what is in front of you.

Source: Unknown

From Ozzie Gontang, a fellow Vistage Chair.

  • Business models are material, and material things die. 
  • Business propositions are ideas, and ideas are eternal.
  • How a company does what it does will and should continually change. 
  • What the company represents to its customers, properly understood, can be relevant for ages.
  • As our lives shift, it is important that our mindset shifts along with it. 
  • As leaders, our responsibility is to provide hope, support, and clarity. 

DAILY QUESTIONS FOR LEADERS

  1. What am I grateful for today?
  2. What are my three areas of focus that are in my control?
  3. How am I communicating with my Employees, Customers, and Vendors?
  4. What expectations of “Normal” am I letting go of today? How will I conduct our business in a different environment?
  5. How am I practicing self -care to keep my cup full so I can support my family, organization, and community?
  6. How can I give back to help support others this time? How can I help those who cannot go out?
  7. How will I conduct our business in a different environment (shelter in place)? Office supplies? Banking? 
  8. How do we go about preparing for the eventual “ramp up?”
  9. What will we want this company to look like when we are back up and humming? 

Question 8 carves out a portion of the leader’s attention and focuses it on establishing a process early-on to start thinking about the future (vs. just wallowing in the current mess); and, 

Question 9 accepts that we will not likely, nor should we, look and act and be exactly what we were before the storm. We must turn our attention to (at least) these two future challenges and find a way for our firm(s) to learn from and take advantage of having our noses shoved into this unexpected learning process. If we don’t, no one in the enterprise will, and that will be the real long-term cost of coronavirus. 

Oops, I Was Thinking Out Loud

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

How often have we said this to ourselves and discovered unintended consequences? As leaders, we know that others are always watching what we do and listening and reacting to what we say. And, when we are with our office staff, in the factory or the field, most of us are conscious of what we say and how we show up.

I wonder though, if we have this same awareness as leaders when we are with our leadership team. Or, for that matter, when we, as members of the leadership team, are with our bosses and our colleagues. You may be thinking (silently?) so, are you saying I want to be aware of what I am saying all the time? Yikes!!

My sense is the answer is yes. When we think out loud, sometimes we create expectations, alarm, or even actions that we did not intend. Recently, one of my clients shared this story: “I was sitting in my office with my VP of Operations, I was thinking out loud, wondering what we needed to do next to get to the growth goals I have. I was going on and on about my frustrations and concerns. The next day, he came back to my office and asked me if I was planning to sell the company. He apparently had gone home and thought about what I had said all night.

In my own experience, when I have the presence to say, “May I think out loud for a moment?” or “Can I just vent for a moment?” that frames the conversation. And sometimes, this pausing reminds me that it is best to ‘zip it.’

What has been your experience?

Let’s work together. You can learn more about my leadership coaching and peer advisory boards here. 

YOU PIVOT™: Leaving Ownership, For Now

by Elisa Spain Comment Closed

Listen to my recent appearance on the ‘On The Brink’ podcast here.

As part of my continuing YOU PIVOT™ Series, I interviewed Ray to hear his story. 

 Ray started his career in the large-corporate world, added a couple of gigs with smaller companies, and after a dozen years of working for others, he founded a company which he led for 11 years. Ray sold his business eight years ago, at the age of 45, and today is the sales and business development leader for a company where he has no ownership interest. 

Much like Jake, who I wrote about last month, here, Ray was burned-out after the sale. 

“The guys who acquired my company were hardcore, high motor people. Because I had an earn-out, I was spending all my time protecting my customers and my employees. It was exhausting. I managed to stay twelve of the fifteen months of my agreement.

I had a two-year non-compete, which at the time seemed onerous and, in retrospect, was a gift. 

I remember reading a lot and reacquainting myself with what was going on in the world. It turned out to be a sabbatical year. I had already decided I was not ready to start another business. I planned to work for someone else for a while and figure it out. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to find something because of where I was in my life and wellbeing.”

Ray hired a life coach shortly before he exited the acquiring company. The coach told him he was “suffering from PTSD and should see a therapist.” Ray chose not to go the therapy route, but he committed to coaching and learned a ton from it. 

With the help of assessments, coaching helped Ray understand his style and his strengths. He learned to use this knowledge to choose what would be next and develop a life plan.  

“I spent time re-establishing my health, my brand, and discovering what I enjoyed. I starting blogging, got more into music, joined a band, doing things I hadn’t done in a long time. I had some repair work to do with my family, and I got busy doing it. While I had been there for all the ball games, etc., I was rarely mentally present. I was fortunate to have this second chance to be there for real.”

On the business side, Ray began consulting with startups. Consulting enabled Ray to stay in the game, but he soon realized it wasn’t for him. He missed going to an office and having colleagues.

His work with the coach helped him see that starting a business wasn’t for him, at least not right away. Together they looked at various paths along several dimensions, and entrepreneurship had too many red lights. Ray was fearful of the toll it might take on his family, again, and didn’t want that or the financial risk.

He ultimately settled on sales management. His first gig was a practice run, not the best fit, but it got him accustomed to working for someone else again. 

When I asked him if he still had the itch to start another business, he responded, 

“Entrepreneurship is in my blood. I’ve always been around it. I aspired to it because of my dad, who was an inventor and a successful business owner. I also had grandparents and an uncle who were successful entrepreneurs.

I’ve learned so much from the first time and working with others. I am torn, I don’t want the stress of running my own business and the risk to my relationships with my wife and kids. Maybe a side hustle? I feel as though my entrepreneurial journey went unfinished.”

Here are the learnings Ray shared: 

#1 on selling your business

  • Be prepared for the huge distraction the sale will be and the fallout afterward, the aftermath, even in the best of circumstances it is going to be a life change. 
  • Hire a coach 
  • Take time off, allow yourself time to get your perspective back – The further away I get from my company, the more I see how I made small things matter to my psyche. I had to relearn the philosophy I wanted to live by, “when something maddening happens – ask yourself if this is going to matter in an hour, in a day, in a week, in a month in a year.”

If you decide to work for someone else:

  • Be prepared for how your perspective needs to change from being an employer to an employee
  • Get a first gig. I got better at being an employee the second time. 
  • Be selective about your manager and the corporate culture. The first time I focused solely on choosing an interesting business model. The second time I focused on culture as my number one requirement, and I was lucky to find a manager that valued my contribution.
  • Recognize that when you are an employee, managing up is at least as, if not more important, than managing down. 

Let’s work together. You can learn more about my leadership coaching and peer advisory boards here. 

AND If you have a story you are willing to share in this blog or know someone who does, please contact me.