How Does Your Company Handle Conflict?

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Which of these describes your culture:

  1. Conflict is out in the open; we respectfully disagree in meetings and discuss the issue until we reach resolution or acceptance
  2. Conflict is handled by the boss; we all agree in the meeting and then lobby our position to the boss afterwards and he or she resolves the conflict
  3. Conflict is buried; we all agree in meetings, whoever is the leader decides and if we disagree, we keep it to ourselves

If your company operates under either #2 or #3 above, what is the cost?

  • What new ideas or innovations are being lost when people are afraid to speak up?
  • What is most important to you as a leader, being right or being effective? How does this show up in how you respond to conflict?
  • Are high potential team members giving their all somewhere else in their life? Or even leaving to contribute somewhere else?
  • How much are you leaving on the table that might be there for the taking, if people argued for the best answer?

What Our Vistage Members Want You to Know

Vistage Works

Elisa K. Spain

The Meaning Of Labor Day

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

When the first nationally recognized Labor Day was celebrated in 1894, the day consisted of a street parade sending up a message of “the strength and esprit de corps of the trade and labor organizations” (in the words of the AFL). We have come a long way since then. Today most employers focus on offering opportunities and benefits to attract and retain talent; as a result, the need for unions has diminished and few remain.

Yet we still celebrate the day as a national holiday. Perhaps it is simply tradition, or the acknowledgment of the end of summer. Or a reminder to celebrate how far we have come as a nation of leaders and followers, where two-way communication has become much more the norm than work place “negotiations”.

So, as you enjoy your family barbecues, or however you celebrate the day, I encourage you to pause and ask yourself:

  • As a leader, what can I do tomorrow to let each member of my team know they are valued and are essential to our success?
  • As a follower, what I can do tomorrow to let my boss know what else I can do to add value to the success of our company?

What Our Members Want You to Know

Vistage Works

Elisa K. Spain

What Exactly Is Vulnerability?

by Elisa Spain2 Comments

 

I have received several comments about last week’s blog, so I thought I would continue the dialogue.

Here are some of the questions:

  • Does vulnerability have to mean showing emotion?
  • It’s okay for a woman to have tears and talk about feelings, but still not okay for men?
  • What’s the difference between showing vulnerability and showing weakness?
  • How do we, as leaders, coach the leaders we work with on how to show up both confident and vulnerable?

Great questions. In fact, this was a discussion at my last Vistage CEO meeting and here are a few of the stories I heard from them and from others who responded to my blog. Please share yours.

“I was a relatively new leader of a high growth business. We missed our numbers one year, and up in the front of the room, I teared up when I shared the news to my team. I definitely felt shame.. and the team rallied, each leader coming up to me to commit to what they would do to make sure it didn’t happen again.”

“Having entered the two most emotionless organizations -West Point at age 18 and Marines at age 22-, in some way hardened me to emotional outward signs, and especially as a small unit infantry combat commander in Vietnam; we had to suppress and not show any emotions despite what we may have felt internally. The problem being that to show emotions to the 18-19 year old young Marines that we led wasn’t viewed as something commanders did and we worried that emotions might enter into the brutal things we had to do in the infantry…. In our generation it wasn’t considered ‘Marine like’ to show emotion—which of course led many of us to suppress PTSD feelings.”

“I have been working on culture in my company. Frustrated with the lack of progress, I stood up in front of the entire leadership team, all levels, and told my personal story, my values, my expectations of myself as a leader. Wow, what an impact it had; people began to ‘get it’. And yet, I discovered that my two senior leaders, both women, struggled with this. They said they work hard to be “professional” and to them showing or talking about feelings was weak and unprofessional.”

For all leaders, it is important to have followers trust our message. As such, there is a fine line between appearing vulnerable, yet confident, and appearing weak.  These stories speak to different ways to address this challenge.

For me it’s something like this,

 

Vulnerable is I am human, I make mistakes, I admit them, I learn from them and I move on
Weak is I am uncertain, I don’t trust myself, I don’t know what to do.

 

Is There A Place For Vulnerability In Leadership?

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

Over and over again, I have witnessed the power of vulnerability. A leader is up in front of the room and shows emotion, feels shame, and then discovers people are drawn to him or her instead. I have experienced the feeling myself, and I have been one of the people in the room, when the person in front was “real”.

After all, isn’t authenticity what showing vulnerability is all about? Simply allowing others to see and feel how we feel?

Giving them a chance to say, “me too” and empathize.

Brene’ Brown argues that one cannot have innovation and creativity without vulnerability. It’s the willingness to take risks that is at the root of our willingness to be vulnerable. Said another way, it is the courage to be wrong, and then wrong again, that leads to discovery, that leads to innovation.

And when a person who took the risks was wrong, and then wrong again, and then achieves success, shares their journey, the impact can be all the more powerful. Often when we look in the mirror, we see our vulnerabilities and when others look, they see our success.

We are all in transition, all on a journey through this thing called life. And we are each in a different place on the journey. When those of us in leadership roles, who may be perceived as “having it all”, share our real stories, we inspire others to join the journey.

 

Elisa K. Spain

Problem Solving Or Management?

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Continuing the theme of execution:

As leaders and managers, we have been taught to find the root cause and fix the problem.  And, in my experience, some problems can’t be “solved” (and, hopefully, made to go away) – they must be managed and may require the leader’s repetitive attention and time.

For me the key word here is repetition. For anything to be sustainable, it must be repeated. We humans get distracted, forget what we learned and have to be reminded. This is what Vistage is all about. Our members hear from a speaker 8 times a year. Do you really think each speaker brings something new to the table? Rather, they often are reinforcing a similar message. And, we hear the message differently depending on where we are in our lives and our businesses at the time. An entrepreneur leading a start-up will hear a leadership message differently 10 years later when he or she is challenged with building a leadership team that will lead to a sustainable enterprise.

I asked one of our long term Vistage members recently if he had ever considered leaving Vistage. His answer was “never, I learn something at every meeting, every one-to-one.” He leads a highly successful, high growth business. My belief is he learns something new each time, because he comes ready to listen each time.

The same is true for the people that work for us. Some problems can’t be solved, because things happen. Life isn’t static and our businesses and our processes aren’t static. I frequently talk about the DIME Method: Design, Implement, Monitor, Evaluate. For me the repetition speaks to the Monitor and Evaluate part of the continuum. As problems get solved and things change, we must monitor, evaluate and then design again.

As you mull over this idea that problems can’t be solved, I encourage you to ask yourself the following questions:

  • When was the last time I monitored or evaluated the systems I have in place?
  • Are we doing things, “because that’s the way we have always done it”?
  • Am I ready to look and listen with fresh eyes to what I have heard and seen before?

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

 

Vision Is Not Enough…

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

Successful leaders have both vision and execution.

Lots of people have great ideas, and in my experience, it’s execution that creates success.  Why ‘Big Picture Only’ Leaders Fail.

And, what exactly defines execution? Last week, I began a conversation about one of the key components of execution – Capacity: Is It Capacity Or Is It Making Choices?

Continuing that theme, equally important to execution is Focus.

Successful leaders know they must set a vision – so there is a destination that their team can rally around. Once the vision is defined, they work with their team to set a business strategy to achieve the vision and then, they and their teams….

Focus, Focus, Focus on what needs to happen to get from here to there.

Successful leaders are able to tune out distractions and focus on moving forward. They have the ability to differentiate between a distraction and important new information and act accordingly. They know what needs to get done, how to do it and, they have the ability to inspire their teams to stay focused and avoid fatigue when things don’t move at the pace they want.

More on execution in coming weeks.

Elisa K. Spain

 

Consensus Gives You Beige

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

When a leader asks for input and then makes a decision, the result is vivid color, i.e. a better decision. It is a better decision for lots of reasons.

First and foremost, your team feels valued when they are asked to participate in the decision process.

Second, there is value in the wisdom of crowds; many times the group will surface ideas that the leader hasn’t thought about. As a Vistage Chair and leadership coach, I see this happen each month during the executive sessions I lead with CEOs and Key Executives. This, of course, is why nearly 20,000 people around the world are members of Vistage – because we know the value of seeking input from others.

Where it all goes awry, is when we seek consensus either from our team or from our Vistage group (or our family, friends, etc). With consensus all the colors get mixed together, resulting in a dull beige, i.e. a mediocre, watered down decision.

Sometimes this may be okay, when the goal is more about participation that it is about making decisions. The key is being mindful of your goal.

So, the next time you are asking for input, ask yourself, “is it vivid color I want or is beige okay?” And, if it is color you want, don’t settle for beige. Make the final decision yourself.

Elisa K. Spain

 

 

Is It Good Enough?

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

How often do we notice something, point it out and then regret it later; wishing we had kept quiet? 

How often do we wait for more information, or better information, and miss an opportunity?

There is both a time factor and a human factor to achieving results. We often wait too long, strive for that final 5%, hoping to have perfect info upon which to base our decision.  

Or, instead of building up the confidence of the person doing the job, we ask for one more change, one more fix and lose sight of appreciating what has already been accomplished.

In our quest for excellence, sometimes we forget that perfection and excellence are not the same. Excellence sometimes is simply knowing what to accept as good enough and what to overlook.

Here’s an idea…

Today, instead of looking around your office, your plant, or your long to-do list and noticing what is missing:

  • What if instead, you noticed a critical item that is working and gave someone specific, positive feedback?
  • And, decided to overlook something less important, that may not be exactly what you wanted, but is really good enough?

 

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

Are You Favoring The Heroic Over The Prudent?

by Elisa Spain1 Comment

 

We worship winners – especially those who demonstrate leadership, confront a crisis and prevail. There’s nothing wrong with that, as long as the hero did not create the crisis in the first place.

But what about those who keep crises from erupting at all?

Who are the UNSUNG heroes working for you (and helping you avoid the ditch)?

Who are the wise that simply do the right thing, rather than the bold thing?

Are you only recognizing the “heroes” in your company, and ignoring those who help you avoid the storms altogether?

 

Elisa K. Spain

 

Words Matter Part II

by Elisa SpainNo Comments

 

A few weeks ago, my post “Words Matter“, generated several responses. One reader reminded me, like with everything, there is another side. The side of being too politically correct. The place where we so carefully script our words that we lose any sense of real communication.

What to do? On the one hand, increasingly we hear words of hate and intolerance, on the other, more and more we hear words that are so crafted they don’t mean anything. How do we reconcile these two opposing trends in our society?

I wonder if the common theme between the two is a lack of authenticity? And…

  • If fear is what is truly present, rather than intolerance, how do we express this authentically?
  • Is it possible to be authentic and at the same time express tolerance of differences?
  • Is it possible to be authentic and be kind in the words and tone we choose?
  • Is it possible to express our fears and concerns while being open to hearing someone else’s truth?

 

Elisa K. Spain